Novel Review by KC Beaumont
Disclaimer: Many novels are provided for the purpose of review, but this particular book was not. KC Beaumont purchased Homo Action Love Story! on her own and not for the intention of reviewing. Then she loved it so much, she couldn’t help herself and had to let us know what she thought.
As much as my love for Ben Monopoli makes me hate to admit it, if Homo Action Love Story! had been written by an author with whom I was not familiar (had to throw in a complicated bit of unnatural-sounding grammar to make Clemente proud), I might not have taken a chance on this fantastic novel. I love Mr. Monopoli’s honest writing style and the easy way he can suck the reader into a scene. His characters are realistic, flawed, frustrating, and perfect in their imperfection. Reading the blurb and the quirky title for his latest novel, though, I was expecting more slapstick comedy and porn than believable story and incredible intimacy. As an adoring fan of Mr. Monopoli’s, however, I just had to read it… and it was so zilla awesome, I read it twice.
Homo Action Love Story! kicks off with an interesting author’s note preparing the reader for a little bit of what’s to come:
“Homo Action Love Story! takes place in a medically advanced future, where the only risk for two people who go to bed together is the risk of a broken heart.
This is not our world.
Always be safe.”
This tells the reader three things:
- Sex scenes will not include condoms. While that’s not unusual in fiction, it gives the reader happy, fuzzy feelings at the possibility of a disease-free future, while at the same time, taking away any anxiety a reader may feel at characters putting their health at risk with not practicing safer sex. Blanket permission to suspend belief in such a way makes, for me at least, a more relaxing read.
- Such a reality doesn’t yet exist, so fans need to take their health seriously.
- There might be flying cars in this bright and beautiful future.
Okay, so that last bit wasn’t the case in this book. Readers will expect, though, that other advances, apart from medical, will have been made, and other aspects of society at large could be vastly different.
Homo Action Love Story! is packed with steamy romance, athletic guys, and tons of action… and not just of the bedroom variety. But, my favorite part? All the future tech. It makes my brain happy, okay? Flexiglass is a nifty material used for everything, from Jumbotrons, to TVs, to cell phones, to tablets. In its use with tablets in this tale, it’s paper-like in structure and can be smoothed out and snapped to a rigid state. Freaking sweet. Currency is no longer carried in one’s wallet—one can just “flick” money (and business cards, addresses, etc.) to others with their cell phone. And vehicles are powered with hydrogen engines… yes, please! I want all these things to exist right now. Mr. Jetson can keep his flying cars. Just give me a flexiglass phone that I can use to flick money I don’t have to people I don’t want to give it to.
Another delightful futuristic aspect of this story is how wildly popular the sport of paintball is. Football is a thing of the past, and the Splatter Cup is the new Super Bowl.
Hell to the yeah!
Much like present celebrity athletes, celebrity paintballers are paid exorbitant amounts of money to play the game. Unlike today’s athletes, these players can’t afford to make it big and later slack off on the field and get paid just for showing up. There are consequences to screwing up in a match. If a player suffers a kill shot, one that would be fatal if they’d been struck by an actual bullet, that player has been “simu-killed”. Simu-death, or simulated death, results in exile where a simu-dead player gets whisked off the field via helicopter and taken to a top-secret location to spend the next five years isolated from everyone and everything. Simu-dead paintballers don’t get cell phones, TV, or get to have any kind of contact from anyone back home. The threat of a five-year separation from everything one knows and loves is a pretty good incentive to do one’s best in the arena. And as Boots McHenry discovers, it’s something that can happen to the best of players, and it can turn one’s entire world upside-down.
This isn’t your typical “Boy meets boy, boy falls in love with boy, boy loses boy, boy gets boy back” love story.
(Whoa, that was a lot of “boy”s… how appropriate!)
…it’s more like a “Pro paintballer meets pro paintballer, pro paintballer falls in love with pro paintballer, pro paintballer loses pro paintballer, pro paintballer’s pro-paintballer best friend takes him on a fantastic adventure filled with mixed-martial artists and bitter exes and adorable fans and pirates and sharks and…” (have I mentioned this book is packed with tons of action?) kind of story.
If you love tales with loveable dudes, paintball, intrigue, plot twists, raucously fun sex, high-seas adventure, naked remote-control interviews, and lube wrestling… wait. I didn’t tell you about all that? Well, you’ll just have to read Homo Action Love Story! (more than once, because it’s that good) to find out how incredibly awesome this tall tale really is. You won’t be sorry.
About the Book
Boots McHenry and his boyfriend Ryan are young superstars in the North American Paintball League, a high-stakes sport where losers face exile — five full years of it, on an island so secret no one can be sure it even exists. After Ryan has a tragic collision with an opposing team’s paintball, the rules of the game force the boyfriends apart.
Boots is shattered without Ryan, so when his best friend Clemente Santiago suggests a daring, high-seas mission to find the island and reunite the pair, Boots jumps at the chance. They assemble a crack team to join them, including fashion model and mixed-martial-arts champ Colby Kroft, hunky-but-shy sea-captain Marcus Tumble, and Piper Pernfors, the ex who’s aching to make Boots forget Ryan ever existed.
HOMO ACTION LOVE STORY! is a lighthearted, sexy adventure from the author of THE CRANBERRY HUSH and THE PAINTING OF PORCUPINE CITY. It’s a perfect storm of beautiful fishermen, murderous pirates, blossoming romances, and secrets that call almost everyone’s motives into question. Land, ho! This page-turner is sure to float your boat.
About the Author
K.C. Beaumont resides in northwest Louisiana with a sweet man who pays her bills and two small people who continuously call her “Mama.” In addition to being a professional child wrangler and clothes ironer, she is an avid fiction reader, a sometimes fiction writer, and a horrible cook. Visit her website to see her great titles.